She's gone, gone, gone...

I'm leaving on a ... Beechcraft!
I'm on my way to a little vacation with my Huckleberry, a.k.a.: Opie Outlaw.
Now, if God be willing and if the creek don't rise, I'll be gone through the 20th.
If I don't come back - blame Opie!
You can drop by from time to time if you want... but remember, I left the bathrooms clean and I expect them to be that way when I get back!
You got acres & acres of Prairieland out there to skip and play on... no need, people, to all star wrestle in the house! The river is just a mile up the road. You can put your inner tubes in there and float your day away. (P.S. - I'm taking the bug spray & sun screen with me!)
Pay attention now!
What will the trailer-park people think if you disregard every lick of good sense you may have ever been given...!?
Mom will be here looking after the cat and dog.
Hint: It's been a long time since she's been to a good toga party so you might be able to convince her it's time to do that again. You know, grab a sheet & some safety pins, let the braziers fly proudly and free from our radio antenna, drag mainstreet U.S.A. to the tune of "Louie Louie" or... something even more Roman, if you can think of it... maybe even form a conga line through the local bowling alley... I'm telling you, she could get in to this, well... She'd be good as a designated driver anyways, I'm almost sure of that! (You just gotta help watch out for deer, and other scurry creatures, when you're crossing over those river bridges, now!)
BTW, there's couscous in the cupboard, corn and watermelon out in the field, if anyone gets hungry!