The Digital Divide...

Wonderful pot luck at church yesterday.
The general rule of thumb is that in any month when there are 5 Sundays in that month, the 5th Sunday will be a "Pot Luck" Sunday - to provide for additional fellow shipping (and food sampling) opportunities for the church membership.
We have a good number of great cooks in the area -
but then, with 64% of the US population categorised as over weight, I guess you could say that about ANY area of the good, old US of A.
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I made the Lemon poke cake... because my attempts to devil eggs for the event went awry, [No. Don't wanna talk about it. It could be a whole other posting, that story - *sheesh*] and because, I can put the finished cake into the freezer at Church just before services begin and take it back out when we break for Sunday school classes and it'll therefore be perfectly defrosted to a nicely done "chilled" stage for divvying up at the dinner. (extra YUM)
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WARNING: RANT AHEAD!!! .... stop reading now, or, well, ...you were warned.
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I guess I needed the extra sweetening because I was about to go on, to "take on," 2 major "maternal" influences in my life, who were, IMHO, in need of some correction!
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I don't believe for one second that either old lady liked it one iota (that I spoke up and spoke out), but hey - I'm not gonna stand for the old broads railroading along through my life - like crazy trains, irregardless of other people's feelings (MINE, for instance) and irregardless of defining fact vs fiction - not to mention, good old-fashioned common sense, for crying out loud, in what's good information to be passing along to folks and what isn't. I keep telling them that I am perfectly capable of talking about my own life to people, when and if I choose to do so. ... and quite frankly - THEY ARE NOT!!!! (GRRRrrrr)
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Situation 1 - "Marion the Librarian"
I have been giving a dear, 70s-something lady, a ride to church each Sunday since my move into town. We have a great friendship. She actually requested that I be the one to come, pick her up for the drive because we enjoy each other's company so much. She is, however, one of those who has difficulty discerning where to draw the line on the information she retells to others. Making her "Gerty the Gossip" from time to time - need to know something about someone who attends our church? Call this one, and get her going... warnings (like the one, I, and several others in attendance heard from the pulpit, in yesterday's talks )- to abstain from gossip - go over her head, completely. and sure... I do it too... no one is perfect... but I try not to, I really, really do.
I've learned I am learning, to manage the information I discuss with her (being taught a sore lesson on this very subject by my mother, just last year) any who...
I have been interviewing and doing up paper work to take a part time customer service position at the regional airport. It will be a grunt job, low pay, low hours, perk is I'll be able to fly where they fly...
The training will be intensive due to tighter-than-ever-historically-before security issues and FAA regulations, they needed work history back ten years, drug testing, finger printing, a letter of recommend - (which I lined up with my clergy whose wife also works with economic development here, so coin-toss on which one wants to do me the favor...) bla-bla-bla...
(I am kinda excited about it though)
SO!
I get to the point where I need to tell my friend about all this, because starting off next week, I'll pull weekend duty - ending my ability to get her to the church on time.
We talk about making other arrangements for her at the potluck - since there will be ample time to chat with the branch president about the issue then.
I tell her this Saturday afternoon and I tell her just the basics about what I am doing.
Sunday morning, the wife of the branch president, asks me, "As I understand it, We don't need to send out a reference letter for you (???)- because, we got a phone call, and as I understand it you have the job, starting this week, right????"
Hum..."we got a phone call" (red flag #1)
"We don't need to send out reference letter for you"... (red flag #2)
"REEEEeally," I say, "who called you?"
"Well, actually we got 2 phone calls." ...(red flag #3)
- I told one person, yet, now, 2 people are phoning discussing my personal business with the branch president! - who is now questioning rather or not a vital piece of info, [which I thought I had personally, all lined up with them] needs to be drafted and sent out for my file, for this opportunity!?
Yes.
"WE" had a little chat(another, "little chat" - we've had similar talks before...) on the way "home" from church yesterday... I asked and then pointed out... "Why are you jumping on the phone and discussing with various others what I may or may not be doing for this job? When, I haven't even discussed this with my own Mother yet!"
Speaking of which, I'd WAGER MONEY that I don't need to .... the probability that discussions, on my behalf, regarding this subject, have already taken place with Mother - is HIGH. (Small town, Mid-west... tradition. [Lore, maybe even?] Everybody knows everybody else's business. It's maddening, I tell you! But then, when trouble comes to town - everyone, including me, I confess, pulls together and gets whatever needs done, done.)
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speaking of Mom,
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Situation #2 - "Queen of the Dish"
I'm too poor for psycho therapy right now so I'll analyze myself... the bases for my livid disdain for the gossiping tongue lies right there with good ol' MOM. I've reach my saturation point with what stripe of information she'll blurt out to other people, about those trusting (or clueless) souls, that have shared their personal stories with her.
I first started taking a wide-eyed step backward from her on the personal information front in 1996 - when, heading to the bathroom to deal with a stabbing menstrual cramp, I happened to ask if she'd any midol or ibuprofen? ... and I also mentioned how lousy I was feeling, and always seemed to feel, in the first 24 hours or so of getting my period. Girl talk between a mother and daughter - or so I thought.
Phone rings.
From the sanctuary of the bathroom I hear her say to the caller... "Dorko got her period..." Yes, said casually, as if this revelation is as normal and familiar a topic as the weather is to whomever the fiddly-Fe-fie-foe-fum was on the other flipping line!!!??? It turn out to be a friend, and not one that I felt that close and comfortable with at the time, by any stretch of the imagination.
THIS behavior was doubly shocking because it came from the very person whom, in 1968 (or was it '69?) had told me that this 'menstruation' happens to girls (women) but not to boys (men) and that it is a personal thing that we don't discuss with others!!! [exceptions being Doctors, nurses... other female family members...]
Yesterday, however, it was not about the gossip - (I haven't shared anything 'personal' for her to gossip about for a long while now) - it was about e-mail validity... something she knows little about because she could well be the poster child for digital divide.
The conversation was pleasant - enjoyable in fact, until she began telling me about this e-mail her friend "Nancy" had gotten warning about Motel Room Key Cards - that you should never ever turn those back in - or even throw them out in the regular trash once you get back home, because, "THEY" load all your personal information up on those things and you could have you identity stolen off them.
You guessed it.
I called "Bullshit" on that - and well, I had to get the headstrong stuff from somewhere, didn't I? The Queen of Dish was not pleased that I had thrown down on her dish and was not about to buy into the cockamamie story! "Perturbed" doesn't even begin to describe my recompense, from her, for being able to think for myself and spot the falsehood. SHE does not like to be challenged, when she's stoked up full throttle like she was... That gets me too.
You'd think the woman would find some sort of satisfaction or reassurance in finding out that her child wasn't gulping down every thing she was ever gonna be feed... as gospel truths even from HER OWN MOTHER!
Ah, but No, No, NO....
[Thank you, Amy Winehouse, for giving us a universal sound byte for "denial"]
I got the cold shoulder and Siberian silent treatment - which I used to reason out why the story she was relating to me was a crock. It HAD to be a sham e-mail because logical thinking doesn't up hold it... why would the hospitality industry invest in soft ware and hard ware to compromise the security of their guests while simultaneously opening themselves up - good and wide - for law suit, after law suit, after law suit -if it were true?
...and...secondly why treat ME badly over the telephone, because I choose to NOT trust that something your friend told you about from an e-mail via the Internet was true - when we all know (and should continually REMEMBER) that the Internet is a buyer-be-ware land of malfeasance extraordinaire?
I was intrigued enough with the story (and Mom's peeved behavior towards ME - when I challenged it) to check it out on Snopes.com... Here's the link to what I found: http://www.snopes.com/crime/warnings/hotelkey.asp
So... breath a sigh of relief! You CAN (and should) return those key!
(ahem)
The TRUELY interesting story I found while looking up the hooey was THIS ONE!!!
http://www.snopes.com/horrors/gruesome/bodybed.asp ou!!!! GROSS ME OUT!!!!
Alright.
Enough.
I'm off to supper...
and yes, as if you didn't know - it'll be "egg salad" sandwiches for the rest of the week!